Jingles on the Piano

Quiz: What’s the distance between Kagiso and Mamelodi via Senaoana, Soweto? If your answer is nothing close to 128KM then you are totally off the mark. Random, I know. But if you are to consider the area one needs to cover in order to find a quintessential union in the history of the PSL, then it’s not such a random question after all.

A perusal of the history books at 2 Winchester Road, Parktown will without a shadow of a doubt have 2 names popping up more frequently than others. One, a club. The other, a coach. The club; A very rare structure that shook the table upon its arrival in the big-league - bringing fear to everyone by challenging the status quo. A Style of play so chic and distinct it had to be named “Shoeshine and piano”. Shoeshine as the ball is constantly on the ground and all the piano keys [players] have to be involved to create a beautiful harmonic melody. The coach; an enigma - often misunderstood by the people who try hardest to understand him. A man with a thorough approach, who leaves nothing to chance. A Strategic individual harbouring the mentality of a champion. With traits hardly noticed in the spheres of football, Pitso “Jingles’ Mosimane is a unicorn.

We [fans of the team] all knew merging the 2 entities would be calamitous for the opposition, but no one could have quantified the destruction that was looming. A sleeping giant taking what seems to be a never ending nap and a coach rejected by his nation. It was the most opportune moment. A perfect time to play jingles on the piano.

Then it happened. On the 2nd of December 2012, Pitso Mosimane and Mamelodi Sundowns made their affair public. The two had finally united. Life was never going to be as we had come to know it and as they declared their love, their vows would prove to be the most prophetic moment in the history of the league:

“I know this is a sleeping giant and they believe in the champions league… I plan to turn things around. “– Pitso Mosimane

“I am excited to welcome Pitso to Mamelodi Sundowns and am confident that he will contribute to the success and growth of the club.” – Alex Shakoane [on behalf of the team]

The naysayers had a field day. Cynics had already drafted the divorce decree before the couple could even go on their first baecation. No one could blame them though as the club was going through a rather turbulent time - Languishing 15th on the log with fans desperate for success doesn’t exactly paint an ideal picture for a honeymoon phase. The odds are stacked against you. A bit ironic, considering that “against all odds” would become the slogan the team embraced. The marriage had to workout from the onset.

And workout it did, albeit not immediately. Relegation was avoided and the ship was steadied. The focus could now be placed squarely on making the magic happen and in that time another promise was made. “Watch this team next season Phumlani” was the last warning sent out before the coup. What followed was a display comparable to a blockbuster film performance that even the cast of “The Italian Job” would be hard pressed to replicate.

In the next 7 years, the detractors would constantly be served humble pie using the shiniest of silverware. 9 to be exact. Records would tumble for the fun of it. Not only did this marriage produce a top 2 finish for 6 seasons straight [winning the title 4 times], it also managed to set a new record for the most points collected by a club in a 16-team league; 71 points in 30 games. By no means a minor feat. It is not a fluke then that the team leads the all-time PSL table by 27 points, with 374 goals scored in the league during the period - averaging 2.2 goals per season all the while still aiming higher. Is there still a need to mention they boast the biggest win in a CAF Champions League game[11-1 win against Cote d'Or from Seychelles]?! The cherry on top being their crowning as Africa’s team of the year in 2016 with Mosimane seeing himself ranked higher than Mourinho and Wenger at some point by the International Federation of Football History and Statistics (IFFHS). But even these momentous achievements are just a tip of the iceberg that this union has managed to produce; Players moving directly from the club to established leagues in Europe, scooping PSL awards at will, contesting for the CAF player of the season, and making it into the CAF XI with the likes of Mane and Salah.

People lie, numbers don’t. Relationships fail, it’s a common occurrence, but the golden rule is that when you have a good thing going, cherish it. Do not fix what is not broken. Pure logic.